sinking in.

I mailed in my next deposit to Columbia, and am going. Just last week, when I had finally reconciled that I wasn't going to go, everything changed. And now it's a reality, and it's finally sinking in. I moved most of my stuff out yesterday and am in a state of limbo, re:moving, right now. It should be over soon, but I hate living out of duffle bags.....and I think I packed stuff I need. It looks like I will be on a very limited wardrobe for the summer. Awesome.

So now that it's definite, I'm going to start reading more books by Columbia profs. Working at a bookstore makes this easy. I got Sam Lipsyte's "The Ask" and will be reading it as soon as I'm done with this Stegner book I'm really loving, "Crossing to Safety."

But this also brings with it the bittersweet sadness that comes with leaving North Carolina and leaving Chapel Hill. I love it here. I love how so many people who grew up here are still here and all know each other. I love how strangers in coffee shops strike up conversations with you and it turns out you have a lot more in common than you thought. I love how people still wear Crocs here, without irony. And the clear, Carolina-blue skies. I love Friday/Saturday night movies on the Green, and Sunday night music on the Green.

My soul has settled, here in Chapel Hill, and for that, I am forever thankful. But on the other hand, I know that going to Manhattan is where I should be in a few months. I can always return to Chapel Hill.

I can't wait for that day.